THIS IS HARD! What should we do? (by Jacob)

All adoration and glory be to Jesus!

Thank you for taking the time to read another one of our posts.

We have been stumbling and pushing through doubts about why we are here in Nicaragua:

1. We have not progressed a ton in learning, speaking, and understanding Spanish.

The local accents of the people here are very difficult to understand. We have not been as active in studying, speaking, and listening to Spanish as we had planned. We have also allowed our weak knowledge of the language to become less bold in going out to meet and interact with the people here.

IMG_47642. As we shared in our last post, we decided to move into town.

Guadalupe Gardens is the missionary formation center that is currently still under construction and is being run by Paul Rush and now his new wife, Lorelei. (Congratulations!) While living there, we were confronted with difficulties in transportation, the amount of construction that is still needed to be done, and not having the right living space for our family. We commend Paul for his steadfastness in working on this mission and we are eager to see the mission center come closer to completion now that he is married.

IMG_46813. We are discerning to start our own Apostolate or pursue music professionally in the United States.

Harvey, our landlord and who lives in the house on the same property as our apartment in town, is a U.S. citizen but has lived for many years in Nicaragua. He has a ton of experience and wisdom from his many years of work and of being married to his wife, Celina. Through conversations, he has sparked us to truly ask God what is our calling as a family.IMG_4726IMG_4732 4. We have had growing pains in our marriage.

We had a rough week of not getting along very well as a couple. Blaise was extra cranky and demanding. The University retreat took a toll on us: We suffered because of little sleep (2AM to 6AM two straight nights), a baby with a very runny nose and sneezes, 4 hour nonstop bus rides with tiny seats, and Spanish overload. In the days following the retreat, we got short with each other and now have much homework to do before our next confession 🙂


IMG_4666So as you can see, this is why we titled this blog:

THIS IS HARD! So what should we do?IMG_4713

For now, we will remain in Nicaragua. We received a blessing from Fr. Robert today at Mass. We will continue to put our future into the hands of Jesus.IMG_46971. Our Mission/Work?

Discipleship, Solidarity, & Evangelization

Our mission is and will be connected to the University. We go to Mass almost everyday at the University. (Except some Thursdays and most Sundays). We have been getting to know students through our daily presence there. We participated in a retreat in Matagalpa from April 22-24 in which I shared and played my music. We have been given the green light to be involved in any campus life activities on and off campus, which have been attending Household Meetings, True Love Chastity Group, The Retreat, and the Mission Trip to the poor of the little town called Santa Teresa. We are going to begin to plan out how to best serve the students as they return for classes this August until they finish the school year next May. Then as May approaches we will decide whether or not to stay longer or move on to something else.

Our mission is also to meet the local youth, elderly, discarded, and especially families and develop friendship and spirituality with them. More to come on this in a future post!IMG_4671

IMG_47152. We are a Team

So how are we doing as a couple? Thankfully, we have had good counsel from Harvey, a Sunday spent with a joyful English speaking couple with a boy named James (just 9 months older than Blaise), and some peaceful conversations together as a couple. Currently, we have restored and built the peace back into our marriage. And Blaise is finally pushing through his molars!


3. The Right Attitude

    1. It is okay to feel ineffective as a missionary. Yet, we will still work and order our days to serve our family and the people.
    2. It is okay to not know the language perfectly or even adequately. Yet, we will still study Spanish and be creative in immersing ourselves. But in the end, the language of love is most important.
    3. It is okay to feel very uncomfortable in being stripped of your own comfort, culture, and identity. Yet, we will still try to lift up the culture here to greater goodness, truth, and beauty.
    4. It is ok if we have only been called to Nicaragua for a short-time and that God may have different plans for our future than we thought or wanted.


Please keep us in prayer!


Subscribe to stay connected to my music and story:

7 thoughts on “THIS IS HARD! What should we do? (by Jacob)”

  1. Leonard Skillings

    It is hard, for many here who have all the conveniences. I can only imagine how much more so it is within the community you find yourselves in. Raising a child is a great opportunity for you. Remember to listen to the lord. he will guide you. When I was young it was hard to listen and often times my ego would guide me down paths that were not fruitful and sometimes even destructive for me and my relationships. I will pray for you, but do not tax yourself beyond what is necessary. Sounds like another old man had some wisdom for you as well. I know that God often works through others. He does not show himself very often. So be open to his word and direction.
    Peace to the both of you.
    Leonard Skillings

  2. My blessed and beloved family of missionaries: Jacob, Calena y Blaise Rudd. Paz y bien. You met with Debbie in the Church of Combined Locks. I started working as a capuchin missionary in Nicaragua in 1963. Spent all my life working on the Eastern Coast of Nicaragua in the jungle area. The last parish I started was in a place called Ayote. It was on the end of a route of military supplices. But after 1990 with the end of the civil war, it became a commercial path from the capital to the rural areas. Ayote became like a dry port where all the farmers brought their crops to do business directly with Managua. It was a great break through. We have now built up a wonderful parish of 45 rural communities about three hundred square miles with an institute for agriculture and cattle raising. We built the whole parish on family living and I think I created with Mom Mary and St Joseph and the God-Family a very loving environment. I am sure the people would eat you up. They are raised on there are no foreigners because the Blood of Christ makes us one family. You could live with the families and teach English in the Schools and pick up Spanish quickly because of constant contact with the people and your child would blend in well with the children. Getting acquainted with another culture is always a challenge but with people you love and you love them it makes it easier. I am no longer pastor there but my presence is still felt as when I returned after three years. The people still have the spirit of the Holy Family and are great. If at present the situation is too difficult here might be another option to prepare you to return to the gardens. It would be an option of Nicaraguan experiences. Give you new insights how you can live and learn in a new culture. Be prayering for you. I still like you vision of being a missionary family. In love and prayers, Glenn, a capuchin missionary of the Good News. Blessings, hugs to you and all your Nicaraguan friends. Even contact of your group with the parish of San Jose del Ayote, RAAS, might be interesting.

    On Thu, May 5, 2016 at 2:57 PM, Missionaries of Joy: NICARAGUA wrote:

    > Catholic Missionaries in Nicaragua posted: “All adoration and glory be to > Jesus! Thank you for taking the time to read another one of our posts. We > have been stumbling and pushing through doubts about why we are here in > Nicaragua: 1. We have not progressed a ton in learning, speaking, and > unders” >

  3. Paul and Marilyn deMahy

    Continue with quiet prayer time together and time for just talking things through. Your resolve seems good, just know that God can change directions, close and open doors, but you have to be very attentative to what He says and through whom He might say it. We are so proud of your desires to serve others, but remember you are still a “young couple” in your marriage and that must come first. Take time for yourselves to love being together just as yourselves. We continue to pray for you each morning.

  4. Samuel F Schneider

    Praying for you. It was very good to read your blog right now. Thanks for your witness there and back home. Viva Christo Rey!

  5. : thank you for having the courage to share openly your struggles! It is a beautiful witness of humility in our fallen and weak human nature. Even in your failures and struggles, you are still spreading the light of Christ to many. Im praying for your family always!

Leave a Reply